Typical school day

180mph:

Me: *bench presses the teacher*

Teacher: Put me down

(via accidently)

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fagflow:

where is the lie

addisonisthebest:

dad: are u listening to gregorian chants

me: 

image

(via accidently)

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megay:

HOW TO PICK UP GIRLS IN 3 EASY STEPS

STEP 1: purposefully bump into girl(make sure you are typing into your calculator while doing this)

STEP 2: say “im sorry. i didnt you, i was taking inventory of all my lizards”

STEP 3: make sure she sees the number 42069666 on the screen

(Source: teshima--junta, via accidently)

jimmyneuteredtron:

imageKim Pastabowl

(via unescapable)

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highyellabitch:

zubat:

m-ooonn:

she sat in the water for like an hour, just staring at the water peacefully

An angel, honestly.

  drakemoji this is me
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jackblogguy:

when he tells you to swallow but you were gonna spit

image

(via unescapable)

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